After a month of non-blogging... here i am trying to compose an update...
actually.. I don't really know what to share.. but what i can say is.. I am happy lately.. There are things that happened over the past weeks that made me change my point of views. and literally turned my world upside down.
You see.. on my previous post, i was in the stage of letting go and closing all my doors for any other possibilities.. I guess.. things are wayyy too different now.. dont get me wrong.. its not the same person...
You see, I am much more wiser.. and stronger when it comes to the matters of the heart.. I actually thought I would never feel this again.. Yes, I guess I could say.. I am feeling that jittery feeling .. yung "kilig" na masasabi.. for someone AGAIN.. but this time.. although cautious.. he still seem to make his way to my heart and mind..
I closed my doors for the possibility of loving again after my "bestfriend" left me "struggling on moving on.. Indeed, the saying, "love/opportunity/ happiness comes when you least expect it.. " cause I never really expected someone would still be knocking on my door again..
He was someone I least expect.. Not much of an ideal guy for me.. quite the opposite actually.. It was not also love at first sight.. He was actually introduced to me by a good friend.. a former collegue from my former employer. She told me, she would just like to introduce me to someone.. I said sure.. after all.. pakikilala lang naman pala diba? She got my number and gave it to the guy (which turned out to be her cousin).
After a few days, this guy started texting and i replied just like a normal person would do.. exchanged hi and hello's, introductions and all. eventually..i've learned of his age.. he is very young indeed.. he even asked me if its ok for me to be texting someone younger than me.. i said its fine.. friends lang naman.. (as i was not really planning for anything more than that.. )
He would actually want to meet me in person, at first I was hesitant, well, i guess it wouldnt hurt to meet up with someone right? but for some reason, we were not able to meet then.
One time, I scheduled a get together with some friends.. including the person who introduced him to me.. and meeting him became inevitable.. hahahah.. yes. he was there too.. Me being dressed in a not so "presentable" way, with just shorts and shirt and even wearing slip ons. (in short.. not being my glamorous self.. lol) met up with them. Chemistry nor spark was not actually there.. atleast not that I see. but apparently.. that did not stopped him from communicating.. The first meeting was repeated... and eventually, even if he was on vacation, he still manage to keep in touch.
One thing about him that attracted me most was his outlook in life..he thinks maturely .. way too older for his age actually... more matured than me i should say.. funny thing is that.. everytime i talk to him, he would always mention me with his plans in life.. its like I was already part of his future. (to think, di pa nga kami.. lolz).
I have had some dilemma though.. As I mentioned.. he is younger than me.. i was thinking .. baka natutuwa lang sya sakin or he can always change his mind anytime and find someone atleast his age... but the more I talk to him.. the more i get to know him.. the more i feel secure that he is serious with his intentions.. his not looking for any flings.. nor just merely playing games.. he has plans of working abroad.. and wanted to work .. para mapantayan ako.. (parang namn ang taas taas ko.. :-s).. He actually taught me to be patient with everything.. Sometimes, I cant help but magtampo since he has been busy lately.. pero by the end of the day.. when i see a missed call and a message from him.. I would just smile.. cause by the end of day or the week.. I would realize.. he was just busy and he does miss me kahit ayaw nyang aminin.. hahahha.. (ako b naman di magparamdam ng 1 week) :D... lolz.. and now.. he is the reason why I can smile in the morning and inspite of having a bad day or a bad week, just a text or a call from him.. can make me smile.. (blush)..
I'm not predicting anything; but Im hoping for the best..Im keeping my fingers crossed. Im cautious but I am now ready to give my full trust again.. hopefully this time.. it will last.. no matter what.... for the meantime.. I am enjoying what i feel.. he makes me smile.. thats all i could say....
Be happy everyone..